Today begins the long-awaited experiment as I am stopping the hormone therapy due to concerns about side effects. Both of my medical guides are advocating this change, it is not originated entirely by me, and I am glad because the side effects have been more noticeable lately, as reported in the previous note. I was going to take a break at some point and this is just a little earlier, 10 months instead of 12.
I have been on Lupron and Casodex, which block production and reception of testosterone, depriving the cancer of fuel and hopefully buying time for my other strategies to re-make the background underlying conditions in such a way that my system is inhospitable to cancer. My PSA has been zero since January and my tests recently were very positive (see below), so that part of the plan has been effective. However testosterone serves many important functions, and lately I have been feeling weaker and achy, as well as clumsy and forgetful. These effects have not been intolerable but I do not want to get past a point of difficult return in terms of muscular critical mass. In this context the muscles of concern are not superficial, such as arms and legs, but deep structural such as piriformis, psoas and spinal. I think my recent aching (left hip, lower back) is coming from reduction of key support muscles in these areas.
I will be continuing full-blast on my program and getting tested in a month or so. In the desired outcome, testosterone gradually rises but cancer does not regain momentum because now I am more alkaline and oxygen-rich. If the cancer does start to rise again, I can go back on the hormone therapy having benefitted from taking a break. The doctors are quite cautious and emphasize that I am not out of the woods, but making good progress.
Thanks again to the many expressions of warm support, the help with logistics, and the many gifts received: financial, supplements, treatments and logistical help. I feel very much held by the larger field of family, friends, colleagues, students and fellow cancer-adventure travelers.I am very grateful to have such a strong feeling of community as a major presence in my process.